Gear linkage help

Hi all, I have a 1.4 16v 6n2 ive rebuilt but i have one problem with it, being the gearbox/linkages. I had to put the gear linkage rubber back in but im unsure on whether i put it back in correctly or maybe i put it in the wrong way(?) but when i try to select gears it is extremely stiff and very hard to move to different gears. I went to loosen the gear linkage bolts slightly and the gearstick went really floppy and the gear linkages move around in the rubber. Do i maybe need a new rubber for my linkage? I am also uncertain whether my gearbox is actually in gear so maybe I need to make my gearbox go back to neutral but im also unsure as to how i would do that