Need an auto electrician, or even just someone who knows what they're doing to sort this jetta, its doing my fucking nut in. anyone?

What's it doing? Might be able to help over t'internet.

Fogs,flasher,wipers, fans dont work. The fuel pump relay has a brown wire wrapped round one of the pin, i'm assuming that its the actual fuel pump wire. when idles its sort of alternating between about 500-1500 revs every ew seconds. to my knowledge the temp rev couter etc arent working. althugh I've aa feeling most of its to do with te actual stalks, but i dont know tbh :/

id help but I'm not brilliant at electrics just what needs to be done lol