A mates misses has a mk2 gti which has been running a little rough recently, a lad down the road from her is always messing around with cars and offered to check the timing and plastic weld the cracked cam cover for 20 notes so she thought she'd let him have a go at it. So he collects it this morning and 10 mins later knocks on the door saying the timing is 6 teeth out and he's going to have to reset it, not knowing much about cars she agree's and off he goes. 2 hours later he comes back saying that he adjusted it and can't get it to run, he tried putting it back how it was and it still won't start, apparently it just turns over with no sign of compression. At one point he tried to say that the woodrift key must of snapped, and also tried to suggest that it may of had a bent valve to begin with (it blatantly didn't).

My mate has been down to see what's going on and there was a few of them all stood around the car, my mate phoned his brother inlaw to find out the correct way of retiming it and was told to look through the eye hole in the bell housing and line up the timing marks on the fly wheel to set TDC. When he relayed this to them they all started sniggering and one even said some thing like "why would we look there? its at the wrong end"

Fucking monkey's

Don't get me started

hahaha

Bloody retards

Earlier tonight I was at my local chippy, I parked up next to a Fiesta with Rs badges, I noticed the front left tyre was totally illegal, chords were showing on the outer edge, then as I was walking back to mine I noticed the right front was'nt at the same ange as the left by a long way and was also well below legal mins, then this spotty youth came out from nowhere and asked quite angrily "what I looking at", so I pointed out the illegal tyres and the mismatch on the wheel alignment, his reply was it was setup like this for better cornering around our many roundabouts and what would I know about this as I "only drive a polo"

Translates as his tracking's set like that by slding into a kerb across one of MK's many roundabouts?

You should have beat the fuck put of him with your camera tripod

Earlier tonight I was at my local chippy, I parked up next to a Fiesta with Rs badges, I noticed the front left tyre was totally illegal, chords were showing on the outer edge, then as I was walking back to mine I noticed the right front was'nt at the same ange as the left by a long way and was also well below legal mins, then this spotty youth came out from nowhere and asked quite angrily "what I looking at", so I pointed out the illegal tyres and the mismatch on the wheel alignment, his reply was it was setup like this for better cornering around our many roundabouts and what would I know about this as I "only drive a polo"

Get him a diagram.

How does having fucked wheels and bad tracking help your cornering? lol

we need a retards thread.

This place is turning into a retards thread

[we need a retards thread.

Harris already has a build thread

I think you need to go back on the playstation

hahahahahahahahahaha.

Almost spat my beer out. lol

The guy was a total moron, I did try to explain having the tracking setup correctly would improve his tyre life and make the car handle like the boffins at Ford who spent many millions ££$$$ in developing, his reply was the NASCAR cars had their steering/wheel alignment setup for going on the anticlockwise ovals so the opposite setup would help with the roundabouts I did take a note of his reg and I might pass it onto my local very car friendly PC, as to be honest I think the only way he will do anything is from a kick up the but from plod!

Nick I did'nt have my camera gear with me, but at one point I was wishing I did, to try and beat some sense into him

Report him! I'm gonna start reporting stupid illegal stuff I see on cars, it's beyond a joke lol

it's beyond a joke lol

sense this not make lots

Report him! I'm gonna start reporting stupid illegal stuff I see on cars, it's beyond a joke lol

Get a dashcam, I'm probably going to after this happened yesterday; going along in a 60mph zone at 45-50mph because it was fucking pouring with rain and I come up on a corner where a lot of people spin out in the wet. Sure enough someone had and there was about five police cars, two or three fire trucks and signs of a car going down the ditch and into trees. I get past this accident and some retard in a Passat CC feels the need to fly past on the straight 200 yards after the crash and do 70mph or more

Report him! I'm gonna start reporting stupid illegal stuff I see on cars, it's beyond a joke lol

I know what you mean, if he lost it and took out a line of school kids, his insurance would be invalid as he had'nt kept the car in a roadworthy condition and the families would be facing a legal nightmare in trying to get any compensation

Report him! I'm gonna start reporting stupid illegal stuff I see on cars, it's beyond a joke lol

Get a dashcam, I'm probably going to after this happened yesterday; going along in a 60mph zone at 45-50mph because it was fucking pouring with rain and I come up on a corner where a lot of people spin out in the wet. Sure enough someone had and there was about five police cars, two or three fire trucks and signs of a car going down the ditch and into trees. I get past this accident and some retard in a Passat CC feels the need to fly past on the straight 200 yards after the crash and do 70mph or more

But he was on the straight and not the death bend....

But he was on the straight and not the death bend....

And the rest of the road? There is an accident black-spot further along too.

Report him! I'm gonna start reporting stupid illegal stuff I see on cars, it's beyond a joke lol

Get a dashcam, I'm probably going to after this happened yesterday; going along in a 60mph zone at 45-50mph because it was fucking pouring with rain and I come up on a corner where a lot of people spin out in the wet. Sure enough someone had and there was about five police cars, two or three fire trucks and signs of a car going down the ditch and into trees. I get past this accident and some retard in a Passat CC feels the need to fly past on the straight 200 yards after the crash and do 70mph or more

I thought I'd seen it all until today when there was an ambulance coming the other way on a blue light. A car coming the other way stopped to give him the overtake. I stopped in a fend-off to make it clear to the ambulance driver that I was making the opening (ditch and hedge to my left, so it couldn't look like I was turning off through it.... surely?) , and some bloke overtook me and barged the ambulance out of the way

The things people do in front of you on blues is amazing.

They should have that on more of them.

As was drummed into me when I did my advanced.

"Assume everyone on the road is about to do the stupidest thing imaginable and try to anticpate it happening. It's amazing how often you'll be right"

Yep, i love it. expect the unexpected.

Even with no lights on people seem to panic when being followed by a (non-police) emergency vehicle (your allowed to be nervous when the fuzz are following).

They should have that on more of them.

As was drummed into me when I did my advanced.

"Assume everyone on the road is about to do the stupidest thing imaginable and try to anticpate it happening. It's amazing how often you'll be right"

yes if you followed by any vehicle, with it's blues and sirens going, pull over at the nearest safe point and let them go by, same applies if they are approaching you pull over if it's safe to do so to give them a clear run in your lane, after all it could be a member of your family they are on there way to save their lives

I thought I'd seen it all until today when there was an ambulance coming the other way on a blue light. A car coming the other way stopped to give him the overtake. I stopped in a fend-off to make it clear to the ambulance driver that I was making the opening (ditch and hedge to my left, so it couldn't look like I was turning off through it.... surely?) , and some bloke overtook me and barged the ambulance out of the way

An ambulance came up behind me yesterday and both me and the car behind pulled over to let him by, some dick who was coming up behind him must of thought all the cars were pulling over to let him through as he tried to come past us all and he had the cheek to beep his horn at me when I pulled out and didn't let him past. by the look on his face he wasn't expecting me to slam the brakes one, hang out the window and voice my displeasure at his stupidity.

I'm happy to move out of the way for blues and twos, I don't even mind risking damaging my wheels/car putting it up the curb to give more room, but I'm doing it for the emergency services, not some impatient idiot behind it who thinks their journey is just as important as it.

While most ambulance first response teams drive marked vehicles some of us also use our own cars and all we have is a visor sign, no blues or greens. And sometimes we are following the ambulance as we have a team mate on board it or we are transporting a relative of the patient.

But the amount of people that won't get out of your way is amazing. One old guy refused to let us pass by swerving all over the road. Karma was we were going to his wife, he got a bit of a shock when we barged past him and turned into his drive. Police had words with him after my crew mate made a complaint and videoed it on his phone. And on this day my car was marked as you see it in my build thread.